A totally original and not over-done personality trait
As second-year Trinity arts-block residents descend into the haunting realisation that their degrees are about as useful as the male nipple, there comes the sudden need to add some spice to that plain-ass Humanities degree they once pursued with fervour. With this sudden need, the arts-block student quickly scrambles to my.tcd and makes their elective and open-module selections with the same speed and efficiency coke and ket fiends are known for when buying Surf Club and Snowsports event tickets. In the past, the Humanities student limited theirself to secondary pursuits such as Art History and other non-skills that daddy’s money assured them they would find use for someday. Yet, the creature is evolving, getting smarter; like moss on rocks, the creeping suspicion that Art History and English may not be sufficient for anything other than a barista job at Pret is making the arts-block student more wary of their position in life. Therefore, drastic action must be taken, the arts student sets out make their degree marketable and slightly more appealing than blackout nights at Workmans and gerrymandered second-hand clothing that should have been bought by a single mother with starving children instead of a South Dublin Trinity student (also starving, but it's a lifestyle choice, you guys). The arts student takes a leap of faith and enrols in Italian. Why? Let’s ask the people behind this new trend…
“I just, like, looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooovvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee the culture,” said one student.
“Because Florence,” said another.
“I’m not religious or anything, but I love cathedrals, and Italy has a lot of them, I think.”
“I cooka da pizza,” said a student, making demonstrative and possibly racist gestures as he spoke.
“Hot, misogynistic men”
“As an American, I really envy all these Eurostuds with their opportunity to access all these different cultures and languages, since they're all in such close proximity. I’m just trying to make up for lost time.” Whether this student meant “eurostuds” as in European Studies students or just hot European people we’ll probably never know.
“It’s really unlikely you’re going to be fluent in anything as a Brit, especially English,” said one student from London. “I think it’s best if I start now that I’ve escaped England.”
So hopefully that cleared things up. If not, then I suppose the Italian student will always elude your senses, inhabiting the far corners of your understanding as if it were the Ussher basement, smoking a rollie and wearing trench coats and multicoloured scarves in 20 degree heat. These individuals, like rocks, and subsequently like all arts-block students, are sometimes hard to understand on a surface level. Also like rocks, these people form the foundations of our Trinity ecosystem, offering the rest of us life by giving us something to take the piss out of. All I'm saying is that someone has to pour my overpriced matcha latte and draw silly designs in the milk froth. And, if they feel like saying grazie mille as I walk away leaving no tip, that’s on them.
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